The holidays are just a few short weeks away. With it comes all the fun and festivities, but sometimes it also brings excess the Christmas season can include. Over the years we have had our fair share of excessive Christmas’ whether we had three kids or our current total of eight. Rather than get frustrated by the overabundance I wanted to share some ways to potentially avoid excess from Grandparents during the Holidays.
Set Expectations with Your Kids and Grandparents during the Holidays.
Considering Grandparents tend to go overboard for our kids. We talk to our kids beforehand about how we will not be keeping everything gifted to them. They are allowed to pick a few of their favorites and the rest we gift to others or donate.
We also try to make it fair with the Grandparents and give them a wish list for each child that contains 2-3 items. We inform them these are merely suggestions and not all items listed have to be purchased. The reason we keep the wish list so minimal is because our Grandparents tend to stray from the list in a MAJOR way… I am talking Barbie Dream House for our six-year-old daughter when she does not even play with or ask for Barbies.
Stand Firm to Avoid Excess from Grandparents
Grandparents or other Relatives may try to push back on your expectations because they don’t agree with or want to understand your WHY. Don’t give in! This is by no means easy but remembering how you desire to raise your family helps.
Sam and I are very intentional with how we are raising our family. We do not always reject rogue gifts, but we want to make sure they line up with how we desire to train up our children. If not, then the gift is easily passed along to someone else who may genuinely enjoy it or donated. Want to learn more about our Family? Read Getting to Know Amelia… 34 Random Things About Me.
Create a Gift Wish List to Avoid Excess
Ask your kids for some ideas of clothes, books, crafts, toys or gift cards they may like to have. Remind them these are only requests you are passing along. They will by no means get everything, but now Grandparents have some ideas to work with when doing their Christmas shopping.
We usually have the kids create a wish list with 2- 3 ideas. Then our family collectively asks for something we all want. In the past this has looked like Magazine Subscriptions for the kids. A Basketball Goal OR Trampoline. Season Passes to the Zoo. Gift Cards out to a favorite restaurant, etc.
Gift OR Donate Excess Items.
Many people may think this cruel or harsh for our kids and or Grandparents. “It’s the Grandparents choice HOW they spend THEIR money” or “It’s the KIDS’ gifts NOT mine or my husband’s”. However, at the end of the day I am the parent, and it is MY house and rules. If you have made your expectations known, stick with them. If extended relatives choose to disregard your wishes there is nothing wrong with passing along unwanted items.
For our 6 kids, between Santa, Sam and myself, Grandparents, Great Grandparents, aunts and uncles, and family friends our kids can wind up with 12+ gifts apiece. Now when you multiply that times 6 you are looking at almost 100+ gifts our family receives at Christmas. That is ALOT! I want my kids to know the Holidays are a fun time to give gifts and yes even get things. But the holidays are not just about THEM. Gifts in excess tend to teach them the latter. Kids can also get overstimulated with too many gifts, and this makes for some cranky kids… Ask me how I know 🙂 By keeping gifts limited and spreading out the holiday cheer over the Christmas season it can keep the grouchy attitudes to a minimum.
There have been times when Grandparents ask us where this or that gift is. We are always upfront and inform them it was passed along or donated like we previously mentioned might happen. We have heard the complaints of money spent. It was a popular gift for kids that age. A friend they know has it, etc. But we kindly remind them of the expectations, and as the parents once the gifts cross into our home it is our choice what we do with them. Or next time they can respect our wishes, save money, and not buy excess in the first place.
How do you avoid excess from Grandparents during the holidays? Please share with us in the comments.
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